Relationships are tough. You find Mr. Right, but there is that one thing that's off about him or you find the man you think is the love of your life, but can you really see yourself bringing him home to mom and dad?
Thrown with a battlefield of what's right and wrong, yes and no's and is the guy really worth it, you question what next moves you should make in your romantic life. Can't you just be thrown a wild card?
Sitting down with three girlfriends tonight -- each one of us different, each one of us with unique romantic paths -- I found we each had something very similar in our love expectations. No matter how much we may love a past boyfriend, we ultimately love ourselves more, and if our own personal goals, dreams and aspirations were to be effected by a man, that man, would have to go.
It made me wonder -- what makes woman so eager to give up their dreams for love? I have friends who have thrown away job offers, full ride scholarships to universities and their self respect, all for men. And hey, I've done it too. I let my first boyfriend physically abuse me, I missed out on a great career opportunity, and at one point put my relationship with my parents in jeopardy because they didn't get along with one of my ex's.
But at some point, something clicked in my mind saying, "That person is not you. What do YOU want?"
And what I found is that I want a healthy relationship full of laughter, security, trust and understanding. I want that balance of time spent between friends and boyfriends.
I want a career; To follow my dreams and for whomever I'm with to support and encourage me.
In my past relationships I didn't always like the person I had become, now I realize, how did I expect someone to love me, if I didn't love myself?
As I looked around the table last night at my friends, sipping on their cocktails and laughing about the past, I saw a group of woman who not only had learned to love themselves, but were open to love, as well.
And we, couldn't be happier.
Cheers to that!
Sitting down with three girlfriends tonight -- each one of us different, each one of us with unique romantic paths -- I found we each had something very similar in our love expectations. No matter how much we may love a past boyfriend, we ultimately love ourselves more, and if our own personal goals, dreams and aspirations were to be effected by a man, that man, would have to go.
It made me wonder -- what makes woman so eager to give up their dreams for love? I have friends who have thrown away job offers, full ride scholarships to universities and their self respect, all for men. And hey, I've done it too. I let my first boyfriend physically abuse me, I missed out on a great career opportunity, and at one point put my relationship with my parents in jeopardy because they didn't get along with one of my ex's.
But at some point, something clicked in my mind saying, "That person is not you. What do YOU want?"
And what I found is that I want a healthy relationship full of laughter, security, trust and understanding. I want that balance of time spent between friends and boyfriends.
I want a career; To follow my dreams and for whomever I'm with to support and encourage me.
I want to do what I want to do.
Selfish, I know, but I only have one life to live. Every decision I make I want to look back with no regrets, knowing I've done what I've done because that's what was best for me at the time.
No matter how much I might love a man, I NEED to love myself more.
As I looked around the table last night at my friends, sipping on their cocktails and laughing about the past, I saw a group of woman who not only had learned to love themselves, but were open to love, as well.
And we, couldn't be happier.
Cheers to that!
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